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81LOWLUX Regular Location: BRAY PARK BRISBANE Registered: March 2005	Re: Boganism 101 Thu, 14 April 2005 01:40 read this You may have the sickest car on the street, but you will get laughed down the drain if all you have pumping out the windows during any laps down your favourite cruising street is the stock AM radio that came with it. Buying a stereo for your beloved beast can be a stressful time, but our friends at website WogLife share your pain and have summarised their many years of experience in this handy guide. 1. Make sure you bring at least 1 cousin and 2 mates to the store. Having large numbers of people with you will indicate to the salesperson that you mean business and have brought friends along with you to help carry the speakers back home on the bus. 2. Wear your trendiest Adidas tracksuit in case there are any chicks in the shop. This goes without saying, there are bound to be a bunch of Marias purchasing the Mariah Carey back catalogue and you can dazzle them with your style, they may even confuse the bundle of cash in your pocket for something else. 3. Make sure you have your mates ring you on your latest Nokia phone. Let people know that your time is valuable and that you don't have time to waste, this can really help cut down negotiation time when clinching the deal, plus a fully mad ring tone always turns heads. 4. Find the most expensive stereo in the shop and ask for it for under $500. This will break the ice with the salesperson, and you will be the first person EVER to ask for this. 5. Offer the salesman a bribe. The salesman has been trained to expect this, it is part of the ancient history of trade with roots in the Phoenician markets. The size of the bribe you offer him is a direct indication of the level of respect you have for him, his ancestors and his profession. (If you offer more than $100 you're a stooge.) 6. Always ask: "You do less for cash?" And it doesn't matter if you are a Rhodes Scholar... the question must be asked this way or it will have no effect. It has a subliminal effect on any experienced salesperson which immediately puts them on WOG ALERT, after which they will offer you more of a discount than they are authorised to in the hope that you will leave the store quickly. 7. Ask the salesman if he knows your cousin Ahmed cause he told you that "this guy's gonna do you a full sick deal..." This shows the salesperson that you have been referred to his establishment by a prior customer, so give it a try even if you don't have a cousin called Ahmed. With any luck, Ahmed was a real ball breaker and the salesperson will once again fall into WOG ALERT and give you a discount and show you the way out. 8. When buying an amp make sure it goes to 11! All serious hi-fi enthusiasts know that 11 is louder than 10 and therefore better by 10%. Don't be fooled by amps that go to 12, these are cheap Taiwanese copies and are strictly for stooges. 9. Make sure that you buy at least 1 more sub than your mate. Many State transport authorities are changing laws to require all sick car owners to display a sticker on the rear number plate indicating the number of sub woofers installed in the vehicle. There is some dispute as to whether the number should indicate the total number of installed speakers or the total installed inches of speaker diameter ... a very controversial topic that we at WogLife plan to monitor very closely.. 10. Make sure the stereo has a remote. At first most people think this is a gimmick, but it gives you the ability to stand outside the car at Maccas and turn up the stereo so everyone situated within a 5 km radius can hear it, and if the remote is powerful enough you can do it from a safe distance so as to avoid damage to your own eardrums. 11. If you intend to use your stereo in Brighton (Sydney) or Chapel St (Melbourne), you must own a Gemini/WRX/GTR or any chick-pulling car ... nothing older than 1975. Cars manufactured prior to 1975 have a design flaw which means that the sustained vibrations delivered by a series of subwoofers attached to the chassis could lead to cracking of the engine mounts. There's nothing more embarrassing than having your entire engine hit the road while you and your 6 cousins are hanging out the window whistling at passers by. 12. If the salesman doesn't give you a discount tell him he's a skippy poofter and you're gonna come back with your cousins to sort him out. This can be very effective, but only use it after you have exhausted all other negotiation tactics. It is even more effective if the salesmen is obviously a bigger wog than you are and is wearing a WogLife T-shirt. 13. After your have installed the stereo, make sure you massively exaggerate the price to everyone. Tell everyone you spent $10,000, even if you only paid $2,000 ... but brag that you got $5000 off cause you have such world-class bargaining skills. Remember to refer all your friends to the salesmen and get them to mention you by name. Then after a few months go back to the shop and walk up to him, if he doesn't immediately call the cops, ask for a commission and leave with the comment "mate, you would be nowhere if it wasn't for me". 14. Sorry, but no, Adidas does not make car stereos. Unfortunately Kappa and Adidas have yet to realise the potential of the in-car entertainment market, if you are interested in pointing this stupid mistake out to the marketing and product development people at Adidas, email them at eh_youse_should_sell_stereos@adidas.com 15. You now have a full sick stereo in your car ... just 500 more dole checks and it's paid off. Your standing in the community has just sky-rocketed, and your profile among the police community will without doubt also undergo a bit of a lift. and this... This is a simple reference on how a WRX owner drives 2 Brighton on Sunday nights. Firstly your WRX must be a 98 model onwards so people can see the updated front bar. If you are really sik you will replace the fog lights with STI light covers. When u go to Brighton it must be between 8 pm and 10 pm on a Sunday night as this is when all the sick cars come out of their hives. Your car must be lowered at least 2 inches, have 17 inch wheels as a minimum and some form of loud noise must be emitted from your car whether it's the 4 subwoofers in your boot, or your 3.5 inch mandrel bent exhaust, either way people will not turn to look at your sik car unless it sounds loud. If possible, organise with your cousin Ahmod and his friend from school Mahamod to drive behind you in their own cars, and remember you must be the leader of the pack in your sik WRX. Behind you should be a Rotary of some sort then a Lancer or a GT-i. And remember yours must be the loudest. Your number plate should be the black and yellow NSW plates, usually showing your stupid mentality by having something like FULSIK, 2NVME or YULLAH. Then if you see a car coming opposite you that looks sicker than yours remember you must NOT turn your head, only move your eyes so as to not satisfy the other drivers ego, only when he has driven past u can you then take a quick look at his car and resume driving. Remember you must attempt to get stuck in peak hour traffic on Bay St, this is usually around 9.30 pm. the crowd that stands outside Oporto's will look at your full sik, lowered, turbo, 3pac enamel, window tinted, colour coded skirts, auction job car with awe and amazement and wonder where you got the money to buy such a car. Usually they will think that you are a drug dealer or you and your cousin Mohammed are panel beaters and go to Mindare auctions every Wednesday and scoop up all the cars. People will think it's a show car then some one will recognize it and say they see it at Bankstown square every Saturday morning. After you have paraded for a good 10 mins on Bay St, turn on to grand parade, remember try to get caught at the lights, and when u do turn the music off. this will give the huge crowd crossing a chance to hear your beautifully refined engine and hear the rumble of the exhaust, and they will definitely think you are sick because you are original and have the music off, they will think you are getting ready to thrash your auction job car. Note: make sure that you drive at night so people can’t see the dodgy paint job you and your cousin Mohammed did after you bought the car from the auctions. As you turn on to grand parade red line your car and let go and make sure people hear the whoosh of the turbo, now as everyone has heard your turbo you can then drive easily with the knowledge that your ego is satisfied. Don't try to drag because your car already has 3 of your cousins and 2 of your friends in it and you would lose if you did try to drag. Remember: a sik WRX owner always performs at least 3 laps around Brighton and must be seen within a pack of other done up cars. Approximately once a month you can park your car and get out to get something to eat, usually a kebab or Oporto's, but normally you are there to do happy laps. If you see MR-WRX you must attempt to stay as close to him as possible, this way people will think you are his friend. And remember because you drive a WRX your mobile phone should be a minimum of a Nokia 8210 or Ericsson t28s, and you must have a custom ring tone usually you would have downloaded it from yourmobile.com. And you should receive at least 3 SMS messages from your other wog "friends" so your wog friends in your car think you’re really special. Usually though it's your mum and she wants to know where you are, and when you're bringing her car back... [Report message to a moderator]

	Subject	Poster	Date
	Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Thu, 03 March 2005 05:34
	Re: Boganism 101	Dirty_Sanchez	Thu, 03 March 2005 05:42
	Re: Boganism 101	Simon-AE86	Thu, 03 March 2005 05:45
	Re: Boganism 101	Evan	Thu, 03 March 2005 05:46
	Re: Boganism 101	Mookie	Thu, 03 March 2005 05:46
	Re: Boganism 101	hickoz_bro	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:37
	Re: Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:56
	Re: Boganism 101	hickoz_bro	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:57
	Re: Boganism 101	Cressida Chick	Thu, 03 March 2005 07:02
	Re: Boganism 101	Simon-AE86	Thu, 03 March 2005 08:25
	Re: Boganism 101	unforgiven	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:07
	Re: Boganism 101	Hi-Ace	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:24
	Re: Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:31
	Re: Boganism 101	Nolan	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:31
	Re: Boganism 101	Hi-Ace	Thu, 03 March 2005 06:49
	Re: Boganism 101	unforgiven	Thu, 03 March 2005 10:06
	Re: Boganism 101	unforgiven	Thu, 03 March 2005 10:31
	Re: Boganism 101	mick	Thu, 03 March 2005 11:31
	Re: Boganism 101	hickoz_bro	Thu, 03 March 2005 12:24
	Re: Boganism 101	rthy	Thu, 03 March 2005 13:45
	Re: Boganism 101	Aussie	Thu, 03 March 2005 14:46
	Re: Boganism 101	Aussie	Thu, 03 March 2005 14:48
	Re: Boganism 101	Hi-Ace	Thu, 03 March 2005 19:56
	Re: Boganism 101	rthy	Fri, 04 March 2005 01:32
	Re: Boganism 101	mick	Fri, 04 March 2005 08:22
	Re: Boganism 101	ra23mad	Fri, 04 March 2005 02:27
	Re: Boganism 101	ke382TG	Fri, 04 March 2005 02:46
	Re: Boganism 101	hickoz_bro	Fri, 04 March 2005 03:57
	Re: Boganism 101	river	Mon, 07 March 2005 09:54
	Re: Boganism 101	Corona RT142	Fri, 04 March 2005 03:59
	Re: Boganism 101	Jorrs	Fri, 04 March 2005 09:37
	Re: Boganism 101	Cressida Chick	Fri, 04 March 2005 09:57
	Re: Boganism 101	Indi	Fri, 04 March 2005 12:52
	Re: Boganism 101	unforgiven	Mon, 07 March 2005 06:52
	Re: Boganism 101	Indi	Mon, 07 March 2005 10:08
	Re: Boganism 101	Nolan	Mon, 07 March 2005 11:10
	Re: Boganism 101	AE86slut	Mon, 07 March 2005 09:27
	Re: Boganism 101	SEXY 16	Mon, 07 March 2005 10:18
	Re: Boganism 101	Indi	Mon, 07 March 2005 10:40
	Re: Boganism 101	Toobs	Mon, 07 March 2005 11:42
	Re: Boganism 101	Nolan	Mon, 07 March 2005 11:50
	Re: Boganism 101	Toobs	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:06
	Re: Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:07
	Re: Boganism 101	hickoz_bro	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:25
	Re: Boganism 101	mick	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:27
	Re: Boganism 101	THE WITZL	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:13
	Re: Boganism 101	Nolan	Tue, 08 March 2005 06:06
	Re: Boganism 101	ViPeR_NiPPleX	Mon, 07 March 2005 12:27
	Re: Boganism 101	Tarkers	Mon, 07 March 2005 23:30
	Re: Boganism 101	Tarkers	Mon, 07 March 2005 23:32
	Re: Boganism 101	mick	Tue, 08 March 2005 01:19
	Re: Boganism 101	Indi	Thu, 24 March 2005 01:09
	Re: Boganism 101	finney	Thu, 24 March 2005 02:23
	Re: Boganism 101	Azza	Thu, 24 March 2005 09:31
	Re: Boganism 101	Rona_Drifter	Wed, 13 April 2005 13:10
	Re: Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Wed, 13 April 2005 14:59
	Re: Boganism 101	81LOWLUX	Thu, 14 April 2005 01:40
	Re: Boganism 101	MR 1JZ	Thu, 14 April 2005 02:06
	Re: Boganism 101	mk27m	Thu, 14 April 2005 09:21
	Re: Boganism 101	TRD_Supra	Thu, 14 April 2005 14:36

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