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The Untouchable
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Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 15:03 Go to next message
Search for the best insult, not strict on type, just anything offensive or funny.
If its got swearing in, bleep it out. ie f**k that. That we way we wont get it locked, hopefully Cool
In the case u need to insert someones name in...put mine Smile
Grant
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Mookie
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 16:23 Go to previous messageGo to next message
ekana me ti mama su
From what i've been told it means
I pork sworded your mother
ise putana ise that means "your a slut"
these are greek by the way i learnt them 2day
There are so many "your mother's so fat" jokes PM me if u want them
I know this thread will get locked if i put them here
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SillyCar88
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 17:41 Go to previous messageGo to next message
LICK MY SWINGERS!!! Very Happy
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Clown
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 21:23 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Hey ryley, theres so many we could use after the other night. Laughing
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SEXY 16
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 22:20 Go to previous messageGo to next message
pog ma thon
irish for kiss my ass
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Lucid
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 22:44 Go to previous messageGo to next message
When someone asks where you're going, or where you've been..

Answer - To see your mum

Smile
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sleeker162
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 05 August 2004 23:20 Go to previous messageGo to next message
sully out of commando, when he follows that blk chick to the car park and trys to mack onto her and she shuts him down, he just says "you fkn whore" and walks off Laughing i laugh every time.
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river
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 00:11 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Hi,

You're so far behind you can't hear the band

You can't put brains in statutues

When the Lord gave out ears you thought he said beers and ordered two large ones

When the Lord gave out trains you thought he said brains and missed yours

I bet your family tree is actually a cactus - full of pricks

seeyuzz
river
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SupraPete
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 01:30 Go to previous messageGo to next message
river wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 10:11

When the Lord gave out trains you thought he said brains and missed yours


Typo?


My sig is a pretty good insult
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THE WITZL
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 01:50 Go to previous messageGo to next message
joo is gay, with aids.
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SIMDOG
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 03:48 Go to previous messageGo to next message
THE WITZL wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 11:50

joo is gay, with aids.


Laughing ........ I mean... No No No
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Hirogen
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      WTF is a jabber?
Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 03:55 Go to previous messageGo to next message
THE WITZL wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 11:50

joo is gay, with aids.


quite simply..........PWNED!







and no, not a typo
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mick
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 04:26 Go to previous messageGo to next message
I got in argument one night with a girl I just meet at a party and I told her that, she had more pokes then a second hand dart board, not a very nice thing to say now that I think of it Rolling Eyes
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The Untouchable
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 05:00 Go to previous messageGo to next message
i use my one a lot, not really an insult, but when people insult me i say:
Dont hate me because im perfect
Or
you are only hate me becoz im so f*cking good

Or there are the bad ones, which will prolly get this thread locked Very Happy

You arent worth the c*** juice i can squeeze out of an old whores tampon

lol, i have heaps more harsh ones like that but i better stop there Very Happy
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mick
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 05:18 Go to previous messageGo to next message
The Untouchable wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 15:00



You arent worth the c*** juice i can squeeze out of an old whores tampon



Laughing thats classic!!

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fingers
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 05:30 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Two of my favourites:

You couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.

or

You couldn't getta root in whorehouse with a fist full of fifties!

Laughing Laughing Evil or Very Mad

edit: Typos

[Updated on: Fri, 06 August 2004 05:30]

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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 06:06 Go to previous messageGo to next message
bro you are living proof that a bowelbaby can live a normal life,,you can lead on from that and say look at ur head...you can see where ur oldlady snapped u off!!

when ordering somthing for a mate... what do ya want?....other than 3 black blokes and a bottle of babyoil!!!

or you can go down the line of ur mate getting flogged all the time up the back door and needing to have multiple re-builds because of his needing wanting and yourning for schlong!! like the home re-build kit he invented where he takes a leg of ham stuffes it up his backside and pulls the bone out!!!

then theres wrong tribe,indicating that not only he is wrong but anyone even remotly blood related has the same wrong gene!!causing him to thinmk neons are cool and that its ok for blokes to wear ugboots in public!!
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YelloRolla
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 06:31 Go to previous messageGo to next message
I'll bet that your family tree is one straight line.

You'd be out of your depth in a car park puddle.

Your mother has a job at Qantas - kick starting jumbo jets.

Your menstrual cycle is so big that it requires kick starting.

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THE WITZL
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 06:49 Go to previous messageGo to next message
i hope you kill yourself and your kid so your seed can go NO FURTHER.
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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 06:49 Go to previous messageGo to next message
mate ur mums vibrator has 12speeds and a kik start!!

like the rest of our mates.. I know you through ur mum..

have u noticed how ur little brother has my eyes?

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dimmy77_03
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 07:23 Go to previous messageGo to next message
If this child were any dumber, he/she would need to be watered twice a day Laughing
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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 07:41 Go to previous messageGo to next message
i wouldnt risk rooting you and getting HEPATITIS ALPHABET!!!!


whay are you pretending to look through your purse for your phone? all thats in there is, lube and frangers!!
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BlackSupra
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 08:06 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Your an inspiration for birth control Laughing
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Benjamin
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 08:11 Go to previous messageGo to next message
I heard that your parents had an adoption, now I see that's true.

You're a douche bag.... Rolling Eyes

You arent worth the c*** juice i can squeeze out of an old whores tampon

Savage (^)

[Updated on: Fri, 06 August 2004 08:12]

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Ramtech
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 08:45 Go to previous messageGo to next message
your father stinks of shit and your mother is a pigdog
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The Untouchable
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 09:16 Go to previous messageGo to next message
You're an inspiration for birth control....Shake it baby

I hope you live long enough to see your son marry another man

I hope that when you die, you are fed to your kids in a burger
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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 09:20 Go to previous messageGo to next message
ur dad only lets you out of the box to pull tricks for his mates Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad
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stumpy
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 10:08 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Your as sharp as a bowling ball. Rolling Eyes
She has a face like a dropped pie. Shocked
I had to roll your mum in flower to find the wet spot. Evil or Very Mad

Cheers

Jeff
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BlackSupra
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 10:13 Go to previous messageGo to next message
You fell from the top of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.
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Beer_is_good
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 11:19 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Wow, with a face like that you better be charming.

There's a few others, but the best ones are always the simple ones delivered properly, ie with a big smile, a hand on the shoulder, or sitting down and having a serious talk to them.
These ones work with taht formula:
Good one mate but... you're a fuckhead! Smile
Dude... you are really really ugly. < favourite
(serious talk) Look, wake up to yourself. You're a joke, always have been, always will be. So just give up, ok?
If they tell a joke or something, ha ha, ahhh, ha... no.
Or just plain ignore them, look at your watch/phone when they say something, and just go, "Uh huh, yep, yeah, how bout that, wasn't aht great?"
I don't know, denials involve creativity, plain insults involve opportunity.

Oh, plus... "I've never had sex with your mum. The line was too long..."

[Updated on: Fri, 06 August 2004 11:19]

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sleeker162
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 12:20 Go to previous messageGo to next message
head like a kicked in sh*t tin.

face like a smashed crab

head like a twisted thong


fu*k off b*tch, eat a d*ck, go sit out the front of maccas you fu*kin whore, i hope you get hit by a car and die Rolling Eyes
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stumpy
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 12:26 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Hahaha, is that last one about an ex Rolling Eyes

Cheers

Jeff
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sleeker162
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 12:31 Go to previous messageGo to next message
sure was... ... i dont have issues Embarassed
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munki
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 13:14 Go to previous messageGo to next message
her face looks like a bucket full of smashed crabs
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Beer_is_good
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 13:15 Go to previous messageGo to next message
How about "Hey, you're a f--khead!"
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mick
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Re: Best Insult Fri, 06 August 2004 22:19 Go to previous messageGo to next message
your d*cks a virgin but ya arse is a whore (say to any bloke bragging about how much sex he gets)

sorry, I don't want to get with you because who knows what I'll get (it stunned me when this chick i knew told me that she thought i was trying to get with her, I wish I woulda texted her back saying this, instead of saying I wasn't)

I don't want to sleep with you! I don't know where you've been!

yeah well it takes one c**t to know another c**t now doesn't it(what I said to my old mates girlfriend)

yeah well of course my d**k would feel small in your v*g**a I mean you've had so many blokes you whore, it would be like sticking my d**k in the Pacific Ocean (say to any female that says you have a small d**k)




[Updated on: Fri, 06 August 2004 22:21]

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dimmy77_03
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Re: Best Insult Sat, 07 August 2004 02:27 Go to previous messageGo to next message
mick wrote on Sat, 07 August 2004 08:19

your d*cks a virgin but ya arse is a whore (say to any bloke bragging about how much sex he gets)



Laughing I'll be using that one
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mick
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Re: Best Insult Sat, 07 August 2004 02:31 Go to previous messageGo to next message
dimmy77_03 wrote on Sat, 07 August 2004 12:27

mick wrote on Sat, 07 August 2004 08:19

your d*cks a virgin but ya arse is a whore (say to any bloke bragging about how much sex he gets)



Laughing I'll be using that one



feel free to use it, I use it quite a fair bit
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MR 1JZ
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 04:06 Go to previous messageGo to next message
How about, seriously i wouldnt fuck you with his dick *points to best mate*

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mr_ice55
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 10:18 Go to previous messageGo to next message
You cant be a virgin, your face is fucked

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mr_ice55
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 10:21 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Its not rape if their passed out
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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 11:14 Go to previous messageGo to next message
keep that shit up and ill take ur mum off the pill and give you another little brother...
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jackel
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 14:22 Go to previous messageGo to next message
mick wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 12:26

I got in argument one night with a girl I just meet at a party and I told her that, she had more pokes then a second hand dart board, not a very nice thing to say now that I think of it Rolling Eyes


i just fell off my chair after reading that Laughing
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justcallmefrank
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 15:55 Go to previous messageGo to next message
THE WITZL wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 14:49

i hope you kill yourself and your kid so your seed can go NO FURTHER.


BEST LINE EVER!
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justcallmefrank
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Re: Best Insult Sun, 08 August 2004 15:56 Go to previous messageGo to next message
BlackSupra wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 18:13

You fell from the top of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.


And then hit the ugly ground...don't forget the ending Wink
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mr_ice55
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 05:48 Go to previous messageGo to next message
On your knees bitch i want satisfaction

If someone asks you if an ugly is good looking, simply reply with "look, i would put a paper bag over her head and use her as a pinyata(spelling)"

Your about as usefull as a boat load of asains

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UUP-46X
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 06:33 Go to previous messageGo to next message
justcallmefrank wrote on Mon, 09 August 2004 01:56

BlackSupra wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 18:13

You fell from the top of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.


And then hit the ugly ground...don't forget the ending Wink



Or You got beaten by the ugly stick!

or,

you: "how tall are you?"

other person: "bout 6 foot" (Example)

you: "realy i didn't know they could stack shit that high!"

[Updated on: Mon, 09 August 2004 06:36]

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lumpy
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 07:47 Go to previous messageGo to next message
As ugly as a hat full of arses.


Or "you want a match? - I've got a match, my arse and your face"

Useless as tits on a bull (oldie but a goodie!)

You're thicker than hospital china.

I love the old "I wouldn't touch her with your dick (pointing to a mate)", then invariable the mate responds with "I wouldn't let you" to which you reply with "it wouldn't reach" Laughing
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MR 1JZ
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 07:58 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Hows about:

Can your dick Reach Your ass??

*Yeah of course* replies dumass...

Well then go fuck yourself! Very Happy
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mr_ice55
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 08:28 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Is that a gun in your pocket or is the viagra finally working
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mynameisrodney
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 11:04 Go to previous messageGo to next message
"your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries" - Monty Python
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Benjamin
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 11:10 Go to previous messageGo to next message
You only use a condom so you don't get your hands dirty.
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dimmy77_03
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 11:32 Go to previous messageGo to next message
MR 1GGTE wrote on Mon, 09 August 2004 17:58

Hows about:

Can your dick Reach Your ass??

*Yeah of course* replies dumass...

Well then go fuck yourself! Very Happy


Laughing Laughing
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Jayem
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Re: Best Insult Mon, 09 August 2004 14:15 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Quote:

"you want a match? - I've got a match, my arse and your face"



Laughing


How's this:
"You're not exactly a rose, but you know that potato does bloom too."

or
"You must have been birth arse first and I bet that not even your mum didnt notice the difference"

This is common utterance/answer to insult In Finland. For example if some yells to you that "you fnking shtty gay" or "you ars¤hole wank¤r"
you say that "your mum was when she got you...
...and your father still is!"

[Updated on: Tue, 10 August 2004 13:53]

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4AGE
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Re: Best Insult Tue, 10 August 2004 13:45 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Some awkward rip off from star wars probably applicable to some young punk that tries to get fresh

" Insert name" i'm your father....

I fcuked your mum
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Cyber-punk
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Re: Best Insult Wed, 11 August 2004 08:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
THE WITZL wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 11:50

joo is gay, with aids.




wow...i actually laughed to that Smile
well done
i think you're the winner


by the way, insulting someone in a language they dont understand is fucken stupid...unless you're a poser who just HAS to take offence Rolling Eyes
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MR 1JZ
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Re: Best Insult Wed, 11 August 2004 08:59 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Cyber-punk wrote on Wed, 11 August 2004 18:12

THE WITZL wrote on Fri, 06 August 2004 11:50

joo is gay, with aids.




wow...i actually laughed to that Smile
well done
i think you're the winner


by the way, insulting someone in a language they dont understand is fucken stupid...unless you're a poser who just HAS to take offence Rolling Eyes


Yeah but what if i say "Mamma la butana, va funcolo, munga pesche"

and then proceed to say i just said your mum is a slut, fuck you you dick eater...

I think that would offend someone... Very Happy

[Updated on: Wed, 11 August 2004 09:00]

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lang
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Re: Best Insult Wed, 11 August 2004 10:29 Go to previous messageGo to next message
i told some fat greek guy at school that his mum fucks him up the arse with her fat pussy hair dreadlock.

that was pretty offensive at the time
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Beer_is_good
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Re: Best Insult Wed, 11 August 2004 10:34 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Joo is gay, with aids.
It just rolls off the tongue... like your mum's pussy juice.
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riceburna73
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Re: Best Insult Thu, 12 August 2004 09:01 Go to previous messageGo to previous message
so i guess you must be a bit worried about the coppers exposing that sex offenders list huh?
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