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Location: Sydney
Registered: May 2003
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Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:12
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Sorry just ranting about something which annoys me... i meet quite a lot of different people each day, and one thing that pisses me off are those weak fishy handshakes people give you when you meet them.... It shows no confidence and just feels like you picked up a fish!!!!!
Anyone else get pissed of by this???
Sorry for the rant i really needed to get it off my chest, and see if anyone else has the smae feelings..
Michael
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Location: Brisbane
Registered: August 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:18
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I hate it when i go to shake someones hand and it feels like there are no bones in their hands and arm. I also hate it when they grab too early and don't quite get thumbs interlocking, so its like holding each others fingers... eww
A nice firm handshake is the go. I don't really like it when ppl continue to hold and shake or squeeze, its not a fucking competition.
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Location: Bayside Melbourne.
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:22
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Yeah, I know what you mean... I have small hands and am not particularly strong but at least I make an effort to grip the persons hand firmly and look them in the eye when I greet them. It's one of the few things every bloke should practise.
One thing that I get pissed off with at the moment is that I have two distinct groups of friends... in one group when they turn up somewhere we greet each other either with handshakes for the blokes or a hug and european style greeting kiss for the girls... in the other group its all like "hello" "hi" "what's up" but no contact. It's a little odd that it's so different and i feel like the second group (non-contact) is still stuck in early secondary school where they are all shy. How do i convert them?
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Location: 1st street on the right
Registered: November 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:31
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Limp wristed, loose arsed fucks piss me off. It's a HANDSHAKE FFS!
That means, grasp other hand "FIRMLY" and shake.
DO NOT offer it to me like you wiped your ass with it then dunked it in the dunny and flushed and expect me to dry it for you.
NO, NO FUCKIN NO!!!!
Understand?
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Location: Kellyville, Sydney
Registered: June 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:46
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Quote: | Yeah, I know what you mean... I have small hands and am not particularly strong but at least I make an effort to grip the persons hand firmly and look them in the eye when I greet them. It's one of the few things every bloke should practise.
One thing that I get pissed off with at the moment is that I have two distinct groups of friends... in one group when they turn up somewhere we greet each other either with handshakes for the blokes or a hug and european style greeting kiss for the girls... in the other group its all like "hello" "hi" "what's up" but no contact. It's a little odd that it's so different and i feel like the second group (non-contact) is still stuck in early secondary school where they are all shy. How do i convert them?
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yeah my friends are the same. whats weird is when you turn up somewhere and there are people from both groups and ur used to shaking hands with only half of them, and then u feel obliged to shake with the others.
i dont think being shy has much to do about it though coz its actually my 'shy' group that most of the shaking
chris
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I Supported Toymods
Location: Lwr Templestowe, Melbourne
Registered: August 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:49
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Limp shakes are bad. Finger shakes are worse. But slimy wet hand shakes... Ughhhhh
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Location: Bayside Melbourne.
Registered: May 2003
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Registered: June 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 14:52
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Then there's the clingers.
People that hold the handshake for too long. You've long since let go, but they're still holding your hand and shaking.
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Registered: October 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 15:01
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Wet/sweaty hands piss me off, I try and make them look in another direction so I can wipe it off
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Location: Bayside Melbourne.
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 15:05
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What you need to do is find something to point at... when they turn to look at where you're pointing (with your left hand) put your handshake hand on their shoulder and wipe it off on them.
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Location: Finland
Registered: November 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 15:54
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Have you you guys watched Banzai? Do you remember Mister Shake Hands man???
http://www.ukgameshows.com/index.php/Banzai
Try to find video clips of this Mr Shake Hands man. I bet you will laugh longer than 30seconds...
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Location: Finland
Registered: November 2002
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Location: sydney
Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 17:22
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hmmm chocolate shake my fav
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I supported Toymods Banned User
Location: Brisbane
Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 22:05
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Whats with you people up the top there? Why do you want to shake your friends hand? If they are already your friend, you have no reason to be shaking their hand unless your gay and you just like touching them, or you haven't seen them in 3 months.
I suggest you do some research on reason behind the handshake.
Nothing pisses me off more than a knob that trys to shake my hand more than once in a meeting.
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I supported Toymods
Location: I renounced punctuation
Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 23 June 2005 23:19
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Pet hate:
wet fish handshake, closely followd by 'dominating' handshake (where the other person tries to twist your hand so theirs is on top).
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Location: eastern suburbs, melbourne
Registered: March 2005
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Location: Sydney
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 00:47
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At least some people do agree with me that fishy weak handshakes are really annoying....
Yeah they should be firm, not too long and dry hands...
I only do those "crushing" handshakes after soccer if i've lost and i don't like the other team!!
Michael
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Location: Baulko Hillo
Registered: April 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 01:21
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Megz wrote on Fri, 24 June 2005 10:47 |
I only do those "crushing" handshakes after soccer if i've lost and i don't like the other team!!
Michael
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I actually have a problem where I can't help doing this when shaking anyone's hand. I shake veery firmly. It's just the way I do it. I don't think about it when I'm doing it, but relise later how fucking hard I was crushing that dude's hand! lol
Most memorable was when my current boss told me I had the job. I immediately stodd up adn shook his hand, but was so excited and relieved that I almost ripped his arm off. No word of a lie, there was an audible 'pop' sound as one of his knuckles clicked.
I hate slack-jawed faggots who shake like a wimp. Makes me squeeze even harder.
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Location: Melbourne
Registered: November 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 04:14
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two words.
stink palm.
you gotta love mall rats
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I supported Toymods Banned User
Location: Brisbane
Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 04:19
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shcao wrote on Fri, 24 June 2005 14:14 | two words.
stink palm.
you gotta love mall rats
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I remember that.
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Location: Bainbridge Island, Washin...
Registered: June 2005
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Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 04:58
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I prefer a hug and pat on the arse with the boys, a simple peck on the cheek keeps the ladies satisfied
Quote: | Plus, you have to wonder whether they washed their hands. Oh I like faeces and urine on my hands, thank you very much sir.
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I'm with our Yankee friend, not many people in my work wash their hands after fondling their cocks at the urinal. If i am going to shake hands with them I might as well hold their dong while they have a piss as well!
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Location: Sydney
Registered: August 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 05:01
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I agree with the old "too many handshakes between friends" thing.............
A couple of guys that come round to my place seem it's their duty to shake mine and my brothers hand at greeting and on leaving every fucking time they come over. I just roll my eyes now.
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Location: Darwin
Registered: April 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 06:30
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I say we should outlaw the handshake from the game altogether. There's no better way than the good old hug or a kiss or a lick, a grope on the arse or perhaps a bit of a dry root.
</12th man speak>
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Location: Potts Point, Sydney
Registered: October 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 06:47
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yeh i hate the effortless fish handshake more than anything, but equal with that i hate when they grab too early and shake your fingers....it's like WTF!
Nice firm handshake, if they try to dominate the shake, you hit them in the face with your other hand
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Location: Sydney
Registered: April 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 08:46
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Yeh have to agree with you mate, when I was running my recruitment company I would often blacklist the male candidates straight away if they didnt know how to greet me properly with an apropriate handshake, I even ceased working on behalf of a company as the DIRECTOR shook hands like a girl. You can tell alot about people through a handshake. On the few occasions where i did represent a candidate that shook like a girl i warned them that I wouldnt send them out if they didnt learn quick smart how to shake hands properly
But on the other hand some of my mates that I may see multiple times a week/day or clients for that instance want to shake hands every fukkn time..And that shits me to tears!
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Location: Tassie
Registered: October 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 09:03
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I hate it the "black handshake" that is just gay and it only needs to be shaken a few times not for duration of the conversation !
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Location: Pilbara
Registered: November 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 09:24
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Quote: | I hate it the "black handshake" that is just gay and it only needs to be shaken a few times not for duration of the conversation !
| WTF does that mean?
I hate the haters! I'd rather the above version of the handshake or whatever the above means lol, compared to the old 'white boy got intimacy issues and is in fact a repressed homosexual living in denial, to undergo a sexchange op later in life' (takes a breath), handshake. In particular I find the old 'crusher', 'dominant' and/or 'I'll just grab your fingers and then i've gotcha' handshakes to be particularly stoopid and lacking in real 'manliness'. It depends, I mean if it's part of your culture sure thing. I don't go trying to rub noses like a polynesian with folk unless it's expected of me. We can't all just be the same bland handshakers can we?
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Location: Perth
Registered: May 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 09:57
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I hate a wet fish
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Location: Perth, WA
Registered: December 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 24 June 2005 19:14
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Weak handshakes shit me to tears.
its like, you extend your hand to them, and they arent even the slightest bit interested in interacting at all.
if someone shakes hands like a girl, i will refuse to shake their hand anymore.
fkn sissies 
theres sissy, firm and "OMGWTFBBQ LOOK HOW COOL I AM!"
the latter will result in me completely annoying them, my god, look how powerful you are, now, go away.
like its that much of a mission to feign an interest
anyway, its 9:12pm here in sweden, and the sun is far from setting, im loving it!
Eldar.O.
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Location: Tassie
Registered: October 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 02:18
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The "black handshake" is the "yo dogg ! how u doing bro !"
you know the one it's kind of hard to describe.
it's a high 5 with a quick shake (never firm) and a wink or click of the tounge.
It's not cool and makes u look like a fool !
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Location: Victoria, Melbourne
Registered: April 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 03:56
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the sissy handshakes makes you
think ur shaking on ur own yeh,
or shacking wif a chick. thats
wot i think. it's kinda like,
shaking hands wif a monkey,
you know how their arms are all
floppy and shit? lol
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Location: Pilbara
Registered: November 2004
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Location: Tassie
Registered: October 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 07:27
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^^^^^^^ it's by white ppl i se as there isn't many black ppl down here.
Oh and wogs they do it heaps !!!!!
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Location: A.C.T
Registered: July 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 12:25
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Mookie wrote on Sat, 25 June 2005 17:27 | ^^^^^^^ it's by white ppl i se as there isn't many black ppl down here.
Oh and wogs they do it heaps !!!!!
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Got a problem wit that mate? Nah jokes, that's how i've been brought up, european decent, always greet the men with a shake and the ladies with a peck on cheek or a hug aswell if your friends with them. Every background, religeon and country have their own way of going about things. You don't see me here going "bloody skippies and their lack of respect when greeting people" now do you? It works both ways.
Yeah floppy fish handshakes are the worste, feel like grabbing them by the wrist and slapping themselves across the face with their own hand!
André De Menezes Ribeiro
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Location: Sydney
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 14:50
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Well i am glad people replied to this threaD, I WAS thinking 'shit i hope i don't sound like a prick'... but i am glad other people agree with me that those weak, fishy handshakes are offensive and guys should shake properly!!
Thanks for joining in the rant,
Michael
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Location: Victoria, Melbourne
Registered: April 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 15:08
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wot if its not their fault? like
they lack confidence or their shy
or someshit like dat. u neva noe.
i notice its the passive ppl who
do those shakes, the kind of ppl
that dont talk alot, dont participate
in discussion and such... true?
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Location: Sydney
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 15:18
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YEah true thats what i have found, people lacking self confidence and there attitude shows that too. Its not their fault at all they just have to build confidence within themselves...
But still it is annoying,
Michael
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I supported Toymods Banned User
Location: Brisbane
Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sat, 25 June 2005 23:57
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verbatim210 wrote on Sun, 26 June 2005 01:08 | wot if its not their fault? like
they lack confidence or their shy
or someshit like dat. u neva noe.
i notice its the passive ppl who
do those shakes, the kind of ppl
that dont talk alot, dont participate
in discussion and such... true?
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Why is it that I find your posts extremely difficult to read?
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Location: Tassie
Registered: October 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 02:28
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[TOYROTA] I'm sorry if i offended you i didn't mean to generalize like that i meant the wogs that i know and yes EVERY wog i know.
Maybe it's cuz i'm black ppl assume i'm mates with dr dre and ice cube.
It's funny tho.
I've found most men (older than 25) give sincere firm handshakes that kind of make mine look soft and fishy.
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I supported Toymods
Location: sydney.au
Registered: August 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 02:40
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meh i have small overworked hands
my handshakes are weak
meh
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Location: Sydney, Shire
Registered: April 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 03:22
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i had the best hand shake of my life last night...
good grip with well balanced contribution and commitment, good firm hold and 2 small strong shakes..
it was some special
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Location: Brisbane
Registered: February 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 04:16
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i think you all need to shake less hands and masturbate some more... this is beyond wierd
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Location: Coffs Harbour, NSW
Registered: November 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 04:19
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thechuckster wrote on Sun, 26 June 2005 14:16 | i think you all need to shake less hands and masturbate some more... this is beyond wierd
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i agree. shake something else
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Location: Adelaide
Registered: January 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 05:12
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I've noticed that Adelaide most people give the wet fish handshake, back in Tas that would be rare and looked down upon.
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Location: Victoria, Melbourne
Registered: April 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Sun, 26 June 2005 17:34
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thechuckster wrote on Sun, 26 June 2005 14:16 | i think you all need to shake less hands and masturbate some more... this is beyond wierd
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not gonna participate in this thread ne more
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Location: Sydney
Registered: May 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Mon, 27 June 2005 01:26
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thechuckster wrote on Sun, 26 June 2005 14:16 | i think you all need to shake less hands and masturbate some more... this is beyond wierd
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Just shows your ingnorance really and you must not interact with a lot of people... So let go of the dick and go interact with the rest of the world... Instead of your computer.
Michael
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Location: adelaide
Registered: November 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 10 November 2005 06:57
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What do you mean in adelaide ppl give bad handshakes. How can you just say. you can't just put 1.1 million ppl in a boat labeled, bad hand shakers. Anyway, my opinion is that most of you are shaking too many hands. Don't shake hands with friends u see all the time. And Mookie, I know what your on about, theres the handshake then twist to hug with handshake in the middle. the hand shake with the kaboot and bang and fists hitting each other and sliding and what not. kinda amusing to watch. Shake hands when you meet someone for the first time. thats it.
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Location: Kellyville, Sydney
Registered: June 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 10 November 2005 08:14
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check the date dude
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Location: melbourne
Registered: February 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Thu, 10 November 2005 23:31
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clubagreenie wrote on Fri, 24 June 2005 00:31 | Limp wristed, loose arsed fucks piss me off. It's a HANDSHAKE FFS!
That means, grasp other hand "FIRMLY" and shake.
DO NOT offer it to me like you wiped your ass with it then dunked it in the dunny and flushed and expect me to dry it for you.
NO, NO FUCKIN NO!!!!
Understand?
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aka limp wristed dohnut punchers.
i got 3 groups like that simon... its so annoying, tradey mates give firm hand shakes... mates that ive been to school its a hand shake/hug then theres the other group that wont go near you unless there pissed of the nutz.
ive walked up to them stuck out me hand for a handshake to force the issue and then it works.
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Location: Melbourne
Registered: November 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Fri, 11 November 2005 04:33
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Limp handshake doesn't bother me so much. What annoys me is people who don't grasp properly, then proceed to crush your fingers. If I'm wearing a ring on my right hand it can kinda hurt, and it's just such a wanker thing to do. Grasp my hand properly please, then it doesn't bother me how hard you shake. But still, "firm" doesn't mean "show off how often you wank by trying to crush my hand".
It also pisses me off when people are all picky about handshake etiquette. Especially when I'm drunk. If I've had a few and I'm not shaking your hand far too often, it's either 'cuz you're an idiot and you should fuck off, or you have a shit handshake... or you're female and I wanna be inside your pants. 
I'd much rather shake my friends hand too often than shake the hand of someone I don't know even once. I trust my friends to wash their hands after going to the toilet, playing in the dirt, or having a toss. I do not, however, trust strangers the same way. I find it so annoying when 'friends' refuse to shake my hand, or get strange about it. I generaly don't like to hang around people who are that uptight.
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Location: Epping, Sydney
Registered: April 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Tue, 15 November 2005 00:55
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clubagreenie wrote on Fri, 24 June 2005 00:31 | Limp wristed, loose arsed fucks piss me off. It's a HANDSHAKE FFS!
That means, grasp other hand "FIRMLY" and shake.
DO NOT offer it to me like you wiped your ass with it then dunked it in the dunny and flushed and expect me to dry it for you.
NO, NO FUCKIN NO!!!!
Understand?
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w3rd
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Location: eastern suburbs, melbourne
Registered: March 2005
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Re: Handshakes...
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Tue, 15 November 2005 01:18
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Shraka wrote on Fri, 11 November 2005 15:33 | I trust my friends to wash their hands after going to the toilet, playing in the dirt, or having a toss. I do not, however, trust strangers the same way. I find it so annoying when 'friends' refuse to shake my hand, or get strange about it. I generaly don't like to hang around people who are that uptight.
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one time i was getting drunk at a mates mates house, and i had to take a dump. after i was done i goto wash hands and there no soap. i ask him "wheres the soap"
he replies "why, did you get shit on your hands?".
i have never shaken his hand after that, ever.
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Location: Melbourne
Registered: November 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Tue, 15 November 2005 01:50
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illuminatus wrote on Tue, 15 November 2005 12:18 |
Shraka wrote on Fri, 11 November 2005 15:33 | I trust my friends to wash their hands after going to the toilet, playing in the dirt, or having a toss. I do not, however, trust strangers the same way. I find it so annoying when 'friends' refuse to shake my hand, or get strange about it. I generaly don't like to hang around people who are that uptight.
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one time i was getting drunk at a mates mates house, and i had to take a dump. after i was done i goto wash hands and there no soap. i ask him "wheres the soap"
he replies "why, did you get shit on your hands?".
i have never shaken his hand after that, ever.
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That is just wrong. I think it's just strange when people don't wash their hands after taking a piss, let alone anything else.
It's a social convention. Even if you're not too worried about it, other people might be. It's just polite to wash your hands FFS.
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Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 00:50
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Quote: | I think it's just strange when people don't wash their hands after taking a piss, let alone anything else.
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I just saw an even stranger thing just then, the guy in my office washed his hands upon entering the toilets, took a piss and then DIDN'T wash them after
A lot of people don't wash their hands after piss/crap on my floor and I make a point of not shaking hands with them at meetings. They may think I'm rude but I know they are filthy
It's easy to see how things like gastro pass around an office so quickly when everyone is so lacking in personal hygiene
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Location: Kellyville, Sydney
Registered: June 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 02:11
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up at castle towers in the piazza dunnies, i must have seen at least 5 people in chefs clothing walk out of there without washing there hands. now thats fucking disgusting.
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Registered: May 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 02:18
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Quote: | up at castle towers in the piazza dunnies, i must have seen at least 5 people in chefs clothing walk out of there without washing there hands. now thats fucking disgusting.
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Just like on an episode of Seinfeld
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Location: Kellyville, Sydney
Registered: June 2004
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 02:27
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i forgot about that one. what makes it worse is that theres about 10-15 restaurants up there so you do know which one they are from.
*crosses fingers* "please dont be hogs breath, please dont be hogs breath"
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Location: Kita-Ku, Sapporo, Japan
Registered: January 2003
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 04:28
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gianttomato wrote on Fri, 24 June 2005 09:19 | closely followd by 'dominating' handshake (where the other person tries to twist your hand so theirs is on top).
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easy solution is to counter with a wet fishy, let them twist your arm over, give them an incredulous look and say "what the fuck are you trying to prove buddy"?? it's amazing how much this causes embarrassment to over-confident knobjockeys...
japanese style of offering your head to be chopped off seems to make so much more sense now
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Location: South Australia
Registered: July 2002
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Re: Handshakes...
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Wed, 16 November 2005 12:37
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Man i never realised handshaking was such a big deal!
I dunno if i'm a wet-fisher, but i certainly don't put a huge deal of energy into the handshake. From my point of view (being a slightly soft handshaker) it always annoys me that everyone tries to grab your hand away from you and crush it. I don't think you can really assume that much about someone else from their handshake - that's just stupid and jumping to conclusions.
Of course the 'imma stoner and i listen to da hilltop hoods yo' handshake (also referred to as the 'black' handshake) does kind of annoy me though, i don't want to do a dance with you, i'm just saying 'hi' ffs!!!
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